To Make You Vex

In this war of crime, I take no sides.

A Nation crippled.

The amount of news of various evil committed by Men flooding the social media has desensitized me, I must confess.

Ritual killings, defiling of little kids, looting of funds we didn’t even think was possible.

Now I just read and say oh well, wetin concern me?!

Let them kill themselves and get it over with.

Sooner than you think the wave of crime will hit you, brace yourself.

Any of you without crime should throw the first stone, I dare you..

Its easier to do it behind the safety of your username on social media.

What I dare you to do is to shun even the littlest acts of crime happening around you.

Speak out.

Let it be known that you aren’t in support for once in your life.

Start from there.

If you no fit, then remain a disgusting coward that you have always been.

#crimeIsCrime

-auntytalkytalky

Photo credits: @relegallery Muyiwa Akinwolere

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Call To Arms

A time for a revolution calls.

Who will fight?

No be me oh! 

Who will lead? 

No be me oh! 

Who will join this protest? 

No be me oh! 

Who will post on IG, Facebook,Twitter and whatever social apps we have now?

Oh pick me pick me,  I’ll do it. 

This is our story. 

Prolonging our suffering.

The reason bokoharam prevails till tomorrow is no fear of death, as deluded as it may seem. A life where their beliefs aren’t accepted isn’t life to them. 

When you become a victim to corruption, rotten governance or the economy as a whole. Don’t post that shit on social media. You should be ashamed to let the world see our bullshit. They will not help us, neither will they fight for us when we don’t want to fight ourselves. 

Beat your chest and let the change start with you. You litter any street and you are Nigeria’s enemy definitely not better than a politician embezzling millions of funds. 

We need a revolution,  and when it’s here; it is a Nigerian believe it or not that will still handle the reins.

Until then sit back and enjoy decades of corruption, poor governance,and crime.

And don’t even think of praying, fucking cowards!

That’s what you deserve. 

-auntytalkytalky

Pic credits: @babajidebolatunji



Pidgin 101

pigdin 101

 

Pidgin is a language popularly and widely spoken and accepted in Nigeria.

It facilitates acceptance, respect and also unity amongst Nigerians.

Even in disagreements, pidgin soothes the mind, although it could aggravate the situation as fastly as it also calms.

Whatever you want to convey is fastly translated,

 Confusion is never evident.

 

Ehen: This could fit virtually into any conversation.

 This could convey awe, reintroduction of a topic, disbelief, continuation of a topic, affirmation, satisfaction,etc

EG; Ehen so you don marry? – wow y.ou are married?

Ehen my sister – as i was saying my sister

Ehen so he die yesterday – he died yesterday !!!

Note: pronounciation is key.

 

Na wa oh: This is used to express the novelty of the situation.

This is often expressed by a Nigerian who is getting irrational or Impatient.

 

Abeg : This means please but don’t be fooled, it could also convey disrespect.

Eg; Abeg no vex: this means please dont be angry

 Abeg make i hear word; please shut up

 The reaction of the person spoken to will be different in these two Situation.                        Use  wisely!!!

 

Wetin: This basically means ‘what’

 

Shey ; Listen attentively; its a tricky one.

 The rules of concord applies here.

 In the formation of a question, this means’ was’, ‘were’ as well as ‘did’.

 ‘Was’ is used in the first person singular (i) and third person singular   

   (he, she, it), and ‘were’ is used in the second person singular and plural (you,

   your, yours) and first and third person plural(they ,we).

   For the purpose of explaining further;

      me= i

      na= it is, it’s, i,

      him= he, she, it

      you= you

      them= they

      we= we

      no= *negative

      Am = her,him

  Eg; shey na me thief am? – was i the one that stole it

  Shey na him marry yesterday? _ wasn’t he the one that got married

   yesterday?           

   Shey no be them break am?- weren’t they the ones that broke* it

   *pigdin language rarely recognises the forms of a verb

     Shey na you kill am? – did you kill him ?

     ‘Shey na’ could also depict sarcasm or rhetorical questions.

 

JARE – This basically lays emphasis on the sentence its stated in.

Eg; carry your bag jare – carry your bag

dey go jare – go

he is my friend jare – he is my friend.

 

Mumu – This means a stupid person.

Mostly used in fights or disagreements.
   

……to be continued

                                                                                                                                                                                                

See Your Face

aunty take !

Just as world be so na so satan be o.

Imagine say me and you wan promote product, wetin we go do?

sabi we go find marketers whey go enter street tell them say oya” make una go telle them say this product just chook head come out.

ehen,

my people na so Satan be so. he just carry hem marketers full street,

And these people don waka go sha

how i go wan watch film and film go come dey tell me say the apple adam chop give us freewill.

which kind freewill be that?

 

 

E get as person go sin, e go get to dey open hem eyes when he dey ask forgiveness.

 

Mr marketer,so upon all the people whey fill this big world, na my head sweet you to chop promotion ontop abi

make u no vex, i no  get money to buy this one

ann your oga no just get sense,clearly delusional.

-Auntytalkytalky

Photo credits_ circajuly2013

Village this time.

village-this-time
CITY ON THE MOUNTAIN

 

 

*Reluctance to greet; because everyone is a suspect apparently.

*Expectation of respect from the young; unless you are a good for nothing.

*I heard the cock crow every morning.So you dont miss it,it crows more than a few times{31 times to be exact}.

*I watched bats perform aerobatics while trying to get back into the roof.It was hilarious, believe me.

*AHA! Antagonizers of the village head, aka IGWE.

*Juicy gossip is illustrated like this;do as i say,its pretty easy.’Fold your arms really tight across your chest’.

*TOWNCRIERS!!!! You dont see that everyday so i was elated.Everytime he showed up, he was without a shirt,i can explain that.

                                         THATS    ALL    FOLKS!!!

 

Self-release

The Essence Of Freedom.
We still crave it. Day in Day out

We strive for it,

We’d fight for it,

We would entertain our worst ideas,

Get a note, this is the one time you get your priorities right all the time.

Your bad decisions created a trail in which you followed religiously, now you are chained.. 

As you make your bed 

You’ll need permissions … a few ‘Abeg now’ every now and then.

But listen;

Your jailer is your prisoner too..

Release him.

-auntytalkytalky

 

Photo credits: @ima_mfon